keeping the gospel in your sights in pastoral ministry (or just in life, really)

flickr: Prayer by Chris Yarzab

Late last year, our ministry team looked at 1 Timothy 3 and 4.  We noticed how, smack bang in the middle of these chapters on Christian leadership, is “the mystery of godliness”: that is, Christ our Saviour (1 Tim 3:16 cf. 4:10). In other words, to be faithful in pastoral ministry, you have to keep your eyes on Jesus. You have to fight to keep your eyes on Jesus.

And what a fight you will have on your hands.

I start the year with good intentions. This year I won’t get so swallowed up by everything that needs to be done that I’ll forget the gospel. But by the end of the year I’m in coping mode, and when I’m in coping mode, the gospel is that last thing to come to mind. In this desperate race to the finish line, surely it’s my own efforts that will get me there. If I just knuckle down and get these Bible studies written. If I stay in control. If I keep on top of things. If I wake up earlier, go to bed later. If I…

And in all that busyness, the gospel slips from view, and I’m on a treadmill, endlessly running to keep up.

So how do you keep your eyes on the gospel? Our leadership group brainstormed and came up with some ideas. Here are eleven of them (I've included a few of my own).

• Read the Bible for the sake of your own soul. I try to read something every day that has nothing to do with preparing anything. Or when I must read to prepare – and let’s face it, there are times like this – then I try to turn what I read into reflection, repentance, praise and prayer. At the moment I’m preparing Colossians, and I’ve found it helpful to add a psalm to my Bible reading each morning. 
• Do evangelism. There is nothing, absolutely nothing, that reminds me of the wonder of the gospel like seeing it light up someone else’s eyes for the first time. As I read a gospel with a friend, the very passages that seem odd or embarrassing to me are the ones that impact her most deeply, and I’m convicted afresh of the beauty and power of the gospel. 
• Pray. Prayerlessness is a vicious cycle: I don’t pray because I’m trying to do things in my own strength; then I have to do things in my own strength because I’m not praying; and, before long, I’m running to keep up, God is out of the picture, and it’s all about my own efforts to stay in control. Prayer reminds me that it’s God’s grace that changes people, not me. 
• Invite others to teach and admonish you (Col 3:16; Heb 10:24-25; James 5:16). It’s good to confess our struggles to wise, mature believers who hold us to account. Over the years, I’ve prayed with a couple of friends who know me well, comfort and challenge me, and keep my eyes on the goal. I meet with another group of women to pray for our non-Christian friends; this keeps us sharp and gospel-focussed. 
• Meditate on the gospel. Some ways to bring the gospel to mind include reading, memorizing, meditating on and praying through Bible passages about Jesus;1 listening to gospel-centred music;2 and deliberately making the cross and resurrection part of our daily thanksgiving and prayer. 
• Let life and leadership be cross-shaped. Like our Lord, instead of lording it over others, we serve (Mk 10:42-45). We choose humility over pride and ambition (Phil 2:3-11). We work hard and endure patiently (2 Tim 2:1-6; 1 Pet 2:20-25). We lay down our lives in love (1 Jn 3:16; 4:7-12). Our leadership becomes a living mnemonic, a reminder to us and others of the cross. And it’s a wonderful, non-vicious spiral: we live this way because of the cross, and living this way, are driven back to the cross; for who can live like this apart from the strengthening grace of God? (2 Cor 4:7-12; Phil 4:11-13; 2 Tim 2:1-6) 
• Rest. Every night my head hits the pillow, I’m reminded that I am not God, who alone ‘neither slumbers nor sleeps’ (Ps 121:3-4). A regular day’s rest, enjoying God’s good world and his gift of family and friends, reminds us that God sustains our life and provides all good things. Over-busyness, of course, has the opposite affect: it’s a symptom of I’m-running-the-universe disease, and leads to burn-out and loss of energy and purpose. 
• Read books about the gospel. I aim to read about one a year. At the moment, I’m slowly working my way through Tim Keller's King’s Cross. Others that have helped me are John Stott’s The Cross of Christ, CJ Mahney's The Cross-Centred Life, and Nancy Guthrie's Jesus Keep Me Near the Cross.3 
• Set aside a few regular hours for deeper reflection and prayer. Once a week or once a month, I sit in a cafe with an open Bible, a Christian book that I reserve just for this time, and a journal to write down thoughts and prayers; then I go for a long walk and pray. It keeps me refreshed and ready to serve, and the act of writing orders my thoughts and re-orients them to the gospel. 
• Make teaching gospel-centred. Not in a forced “every Bible study has to end with Jesus” kind of way. But the gospel should be where God’s word drives us. I don’t think I’ve really understood a Bible passage until it brings me back to the gospel naturally, of its own accord, by its own route. 
• Keep training and leadership gospel-centred. My husband, who heads a ministry team, makes sure that every staff meeting includes time, not just for administration, but also for encouraging each other from the Bible, praying, and discussing big issues from God’s word. It’s a great model for keeping the gospel on the agenda.

Christian ministry is hard, hard labour. It’s a marathon, not a sprint; but sometimes we can feel like we are sprinting! In the constant busyness and exhaustion, it’s tempting to turn to other things besides the gospel for comfort, like alcohol or inappropriate intimacy. It’s tempting to think we can do it all ourselves, until we crash and join the long list of those who’ve left pastoral ministry. I pray that we can remember God’s words to us:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. (Heb 12:1-3)

How do you keep your eyes on the gospel?


1. You’ll find some suggested passages and methods for memorization in my posts a three-course banquet of Bible memorization and A smorgasbord of Bible memorization methods.
2. For example, Sovereign Grace’s Songs for the Cross Centred Life.
3. Others I’d like to read include Don Carson’s The Cross and Christian Ministry; Steve Jeffery, Michael Ovey and Andrew Sach’s Pierced for our Transgressions; and JI Packer and Mark Dever’s In My Place Condemned He Stood. ↩

how to grapple with issues in our lives

An excellent model:

1. observe our circumstances
2. analyse and consider what we’re going through
3. reflect on Scripture
4. change our attitudes and actions
5. talk to God about it.

Macca. Read the rest here.

Romans 12:1-2 (3) renewed in my mind

Have you ever wanted to know God's will for your life? I've been wondering what God wants from me. How can I best serve him?

Here's the starting point to knowing God's will - and part 3 of my 4-part summary of Steve Chong's talk on Romans 12:1-2.

Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:1-2

We've seen that serving is our response to God's mercy.

It begins with
1. getting my body ready ("offer your bodies as living sacrifices")
2. getting my mind ready ("be transformed by the renewing of your mind").

Today we're looking at 2.

"be transformed by the renewing of your mind"

Our job is to have our minds renewed daily. It's not us doing the renewing - it's something God does in and for us.

Why? So we may be able to discern the will of God. So we can see what God wants from our lives.

How good is your eyesight in discerning what God wants from your life? If you can't discern his will, maybe there's a problem with your mind.

Here's God's will (drumroll, please) ..............
........he wants you - all of you - for him!

If you're not ready to have all of you used up for God, don't start serving. Get your mind and body ready.

At this point in the talk I pricked up my ears. I was reminded of James 1:5-7 & 4:1-9, which tells us to ask for wisdom, but warns us that God only gives wisdom to the one who's single-minded. If we're double-minded, we're to repent of our idolatry.

You may remember how this talk came in answer to my prayer for single-mindedness. Only when we're single-minded - only when we're prepared to give up everything for Jesus - will we have the wisdom to discern what he wants from us.

Of course, this isn't an on/off switch, for we're never completely single-hearted during this life. If we could only serve God once our motives were 100% pure, none of us could serve.

Still, it's true that it's impossible to serve God wholeheartedly when your heart is captured by something else. The more willing I am to give up everything, the clearer my vision will be, and the better I'll know what God wants from me.

Where those reflections led me, I'll tell you next time...

This is a summary of part of a talk given by Steve Chong at MTS Challenge Victoria.

image is from stock.xchng

what I've been reading: what I feel vs what is real from CJ Mahaney's The Cross Centred Life

It's a common theme on this blog: talk to yourself instead of listening to yourself. Here it is again, put beautifully by CJ Mahaney. I was particularly interested in the idea that introspection is a common temptation for evangelicals.

We can either listen to ourselves and our constantly changing feelings about our circumstances, or we can talk to ourselves about the unchanging truth of who God is and what He's accomplished for us at the cross.

Far too often we choose to passively listen to ourselves. We sit back and let our view of God and life be shaped by our constantly shifing feelings about our ever-changing circumstances. ...

Sinclair Ferguson has noted, "The evangelical orientation is inward and subjective. We are far better at looking inward than we are at looking outward. Instead, we need to expend our energies admiring, exploring, expositing, and extolling Jesus Christ." ...

Think about this. How often in a typical day do you take an internal inventory in an effort to evaluate how you're doing? How often do you assess a situation by examining how you feel about it? How often do you make mental reference to how you feel, as opposed to what you know?

Don't listen to yourself; talk to yourself: Begin your day and at numerous points throughout the day expend your energies "admiring, exploring, expositing, and extolling Jesus Christ."

CJ Mahaney The Cross Centered Life 48-51

image is from stock.xchng

what I'm reading: the heart of busyness from Tim Chester's The Busy Christian's Guide to Busyness

The book which has done most to help me unpack my busyness - why I get too busy, how to tell if I'm too busy, and what to do about my busyness - is Tim Chester's The Busy Christian's Guide to Busyness (reviewed by Nicole here).

The most helpful thing Tim Chester does in his book is to talk about the why of busyness: the lies we believe which make us overly busy. Here's what he says about busyness, how to tell if it's a problem, and how over-busyness reveals our hearts.

There's nothing wrong with being busy. The truth is most of us like being busy ... Busyness itself is not a problem. In anybody's life there will be periods of intense activity. The problem comes when we are persistently over-busy. If you life doesn't reflect the biblical pattern of work and rest then something is wrong ...

If God doesn't expect me to do more than I can, the key question to ask ourselves is: Why am I trying to do more than I can? ...

I want to suggest that much, perhaps most, of the pressure to be busy comes from within. ... At the heart of our busyness is our heart. We're busy because we're working hard to meet the desires of our hearts. ...

Think about what that might mean for your busyness. Do you ever think your busyness is inevitable, unavoidable or appropriate? I want to suggest that it may be none of those things. It may be that your heart is deceiving you. ...

The test you need to apply to your busyness is this: if it produces bad fruit then it reflects the evil desires of your heart. ... If your health, marriage, friendships, Christian service or relationship with God is suffering because of your busyness then you need to address the idols in your life. You need to identify the desires of your heart that make you try to do more than God expects of you.

That's exactly what I want to do during the first posts of my new series on busyness: to talk about the lies behind my, and perhaps your, busyness. What are the idols of your heart which drive you to do more than God expects from you?

Excerpts are from Tim Chester's The Busy Christian's Guide to Busyness pp. 35, 78-84.

another quote about condemnation and the cross

Violet capped yesterday's quote (which I posted on Sunday instead of Monday by accident!) with a wonderful quote of her own.

She says, "Milton Vincent in 'A Gospel Primer for Christians' addressed this issue in a way that really helped me. He writes,

'As long as I am stricken with the guilt of my sins, I will be captive to them, and will often find myself re-committing the very sins about which I feel most guilty. The Devil is well aware of this fact; he knows that if he can keep me tormented by sin's guilt, he can dominate me with sin's power.

'The gospel, however, slays sin at this root point and thereby nullifies sin's power over me. The forgiveness of God, made known to me through the gospel, liberates me from sin's power because it liberates me first from its guilt; and preaching such forgiveness to myself is a practical way of putting the gospel into operation as a nullifier of sin's power in my life.'"

Thanks, Violet! That's so true. When I keep wallowing in the guilt of my sin, I don't change. I'm so overwhelmed by my sin that I give up before I even start. But when I truly realise that I'm forgiven, it changes everything. It gives me motivation and hope to overcome my sin.

I'm reminded me of a similar quote from Tim Chester's You Can Change:

You will cleanse no sin from your life that you have not first recognized as being pardoned through the cross. ... If you don't see your sin as completely pardoned, then your affections, desires and motives will be wrong. You will aim to prove yourself. Your focus will be the consequences of your sin rather than hating the sin itself and desiring God in its place. (p.33)

As I preach the gospel to myself, and come to know in every fibre of my being that I'm forgiven, I stop wallowing in my guilt, and start obeying in the freedom and hope of God's grace.

untethered

Written two days ago.

It's 1.51 pm when our car turns into the driveway after our seaside holiday.

Somehow, the house looks shabbier than when we left. I see it half with the eyes of an owner, and half with the eyes of a stranger, as if I'm wearing 3D goggles.

The grass is shaggy and overlong. A faded brown Christmas tree lies at the foot of the driveway. I'm relieved to see that the two pot-plants near the front steps are still green and healthy. Two unopened parcels are propped next to the front door (the postman, at least, knows we've been away).

We open the door, and we're greeted by the detritus we didn't have time to tidy away before we left. The house smells comfortingly familiar, but also like it belongs to someone else. The Venus fly trap we gave our son for Christmas is holding onto life by its dry root tips.

I stand at the sink, and for a flickering moment I see a view of rolling green seaside hills through the blank tiled wall. I look out the back window, and the view of gum trees looks dry and yellow through the lingering perspective of breaking waves in a deep blue sea. I feel unbalanced, as if my feet are reaching for sand through the smooth floorboards.

The holiday recedes like a wave tugging on my legs, and the year's responsibilities threaten like dark clouds on the horizon. Three and a half more weeks' bobbing on the lazy waves of school holidays; twenty-five days (but who's counting?) until we're dragged into the rip current of term time.

The year feels frail and uncertain, as if I don't want to rest my full weight on it quite yet. Last year was hard, and I'm a little nervous about this one. I've cut down on my responsibilities to avoid last year's burnout, but I've also lost some of my confidence and enthusiasm. I'm not yet sure of the me I'm stepping into this year with.

Earlier this afternoon, on the boring road from Geelong to Melbourne, I opened The Time Traveler's Wife and read its first pages. I feel like a time traveller myself, lost between times, floating through space. I know God holds the other end of this string. I know I'm tethered. I know it, but I don't feel it, not yet.

All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
Psalm 139:16

It's true even when I don't feel it.

image is from amangupta at flickr

preach the gospel to yourself

I think you'll really enjoy EQUIP books this week. Today's post is about how to remember the gospel, on Wednesday I'll write about the Bible, and on Friday I'll talk about prayer. There'll be lots of practical ideas, and links to what other people have written, in a kind of extended online meandering. Here's how today's post begins (click here to read the whole post).

Preach the gospel to yourself. Ever since I was first encouraged to do this, it's become one of my most important weapons in the fight for joy.

Preach the gospel to yourself. Women especially need to heed this call. We hear a talk on biblical womanhood, and are burdened by a hundred ways we need to change. We're self-aware, and emotionally and relationally aware, so we're often very sensitive to our faults and weaknesses. We need to be reminded, over and over, that God's love doesn't depend on what we do, that change is motivated and enabled by grace, and that obedience isn't about rules but love. We need to keep returning to the cross.

Preach the gospel to yourself. This is the first and central strategy in the fight for joy. Any helpful spiritual practice is really just a way to make this happen.

Hearing the word of the cross, and preaching it to ourselves, is the central strategy for sinners in the fight for joy. Nothing works without this. Here is where we start. And here is where we stay. We never outgrow the gospel. Here we see the glory of Christ more clearly than anywhere. ... And here in the cross is where every enemy of joy is overcome. ... What could stop our joy if we really believed this truth: Everything we need to be satisfied in God, the cross has made certain. It cannot fail. (pp.91-92)

... How do you preach the gospel to yourself? Tell us about it in the comments! Here's my ideas ...

You can read the rest at EQUIP book club - just click here.

image is by abcdz2000 at flickr

how we change (9) what will you choose?

You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. (Eph 4:22-24)

I've turned navel-gazing into an art form. A questionnaire about my idols? A thought-chart to identify my false beliefs? A journal, a pen, and an anxious heart? Give them to me, and I'm your woman.

I'll think, read, write, examine my heart, repent, analyse, pray, list, reflect, dissect, introspect, with the best of them.

In some ways, then, books like Tim Chester's You Can Change feed right into my tendency to self-absorption and my drive to perfect myself (although this isn't Chester's fault: he takes care to guard against these things).* He issues a gold-edged invitation to identify the lies and idols of my heart, and I'm the first on the RSVP list.

Don't get me wrong: every day I'm grateful for books like Chester's as I argue with my thoughts, battle my emotions and fight my besetting sins. It's important to deal with sin not just at the surface level, but at the deeper level of what I believe and what I worship.

But I've come to see that sometimes I need to stop praying and thinking and start acting. It's not just about "attitudes", it's also about "putting off" and "putting on" (Eph 4:22-24). Every day - every moment! - I stare sin in the face and have to choose to behave differently. That, I'm not so good at.

Which is why, in case you're like me, and in imitation of Elyse Fitzpatrick's Idols of the Heart, I've added a third step to Chester's two main steps for change:

1. thoughts- turning from lies to trust God's truth (faith)
2. desires - turning from idols to worship God alone (repentance)
3. will - choosing to act in love and obedience (repentance)

You'll notice that 3. is actually an extension of 2, which is why Chester deals with them together. As Elyse Fitzpatrick points out, our wills don't work independently - they follow our thoughts and desires. You can't abandon idols in your heart and not in your life. But I need help with changing my behaviour, so I like the way Elyse Fitzpatrick takes several chapters to talk about the nitty-gritty of practical change.

Perhaps it's a woman's thing. I've noticed we're much keener than the guys on thought-diaries and questionnaires and the details of daily life. This is both a disadvantage (navel-gazing, anyone?) and an advantage (we don't leave things at the level of theory).

Change begins in the heart, but it doesn't end there. Let me give you some examples:

• the woman who's been praying for years that God will improve a difficult relationship and transform her emotions. One day she realises it's time not just to pray, but to love. As she does, her attitudes and feelings begin to change.
• the woman who's terrified of crowded rooms. She avoids church and prays for God to take away her fear. But she knows she has to do the hard thing. She starts small - with a Bible study group - and works up to bigger church meetings. It's not easy, but her fears lessen with time.
• the woman who knows she should offer hospitality to her neighbours, but who's ashamed of her shabby house. She prays about her her idolatry - her need to impress people. She repents of her lovelessness. But she has to take another step: to pick up the phone and ask the neighbours over. When she does, her fears are shown to be the small things they always were.

I don't change my behaviour through a set of disciplines (though it will take self-discipline!) or in the strength of my will-power (though I do need to make a choice). God's Spirit is the great heart-changer. When I "put off" the old self and "put on" the new, I'm only doing what God has already done in me. I "work out" my salvation because God is powerfully "working in" me to "will and to act". I obey because I'm confident God has given me everything I need to be godly. **

But changing my behaviour isn't easy or automatic. It's violent, energetic and purposeful. I can play with sin, feed it, cuddle up to it. Or I can put off sin - kill it, gouge it out, throw it off - and put on obedience.**

Every moment, I can choose to resist the first intrusion of sin: the impure look, the self-pitying thought, the unkind word, the selfish act. This isn't legalism: it's a response to grace, which teaches me to say "no" (Tit 2:11-12).

Faith gets stronger as it expresses itself in love. As I stop giving in to my fears, I learn to trust God more. As I refuse to serve my idols, they become less important to me. Every time I say "no", "no" gets a little easier. I call this the faith that comes from obedience.***

If you want some help making practical changes in your behaviour, why not read Elyse Fitzpatrick's Idols of the Heart? Her practical exercises gave me a blueprint to use with any and every issue, especially when I get stuck. Because sometimes it's time not just to think, but to act.

For reflection:
What attitudes and actions do you need to "put off"? What attitudes and actions do you need to "put on"? Are there small steps that would help you with the bigger ones? Or is it time just to say "no" - or "yes"! - in confidence that God is powerfully at work in you?

* And Nicole's too, apparently!

** see Ezek 36:24-27; Eph 4:22-24, Rom 6; Phil 2:12-13;2 Pet 1:3, Eph 1:18-21, 3:20-21, Col 1:28-29). See Mt 5:29, Rom 8:13, Col 3:5, Rom 13:12, Eph 4:22, 25, Heb 12:1, Col 3:8-9, Jam 1:21, 1 Pet 2:1, Eph 4:24, Col 3:10, 1 Thess 5:8, Rom 13:14, Col 3:12, Rev 19:8.

*** If you want to explore this further, have a look at Stuart's series on this topic, where you'll find useful insights from someone working within The Crowded House church, founded by Tim Chester: The chicken of belief and the egg of behaviour, It's a heart issue, Hypercardiodynia: taking the 'heart issue' too far (Part 1), Hypercardiodynia: taking the heart issue too far (Part 2), and Back to the heart. HT Nicole

images are by gaspi your guide and kingary and TheAlieness and brioso at flickr

psalm for the downcast (2)

Last term, when I was immersed in almost constant despondency, I went for a memorable walk. Every step had to be forced against what felt like a resisting invisible barrier. I tried to pray, to think, to get some kind of handle on what I was feeling, but my thoughts were scattered and sluggish.

Into my troubled thoughts broke Psalm 103, plucked from my memory by God's Spirit. I found myself saying it out loud: "Praise the LORD, O my soul ... who forgives all your sins ... who redeems your life from the pit...". My mood was unchanged, but the words fed my tiny spark of faith until it burned a little brighter.

At that moment, I realised how suitable psalms of praise are for the discouraged. I've always encouraged those who are depressed to learn and pray psalms of lament, like Psalm 130. But I've never thought of suggesting psalms of praise. I guess I assumed such psalms would seem flippant, insensitive or irrelevant.

But words - especially God's words! - are powerful things. As you say them out loud, they make their way into your insides. You might not feel like praising God, but it's good to speak words of praise even when you don't feel like it. It's good to exhort your soul to praise God. It's good to encourage others to praise God. As you do, you're helped to stop dwelling on yourself and your emotions and to start looking at God and acting in love.

Psalm 103 packs a punch for the desolate, for it reminds us of 6 truths we often forget and need to preach to our souls when we're tempted to despair:

• God's character is unchanging
  (however I feel)
• God's blessings are unfailing
  (though they may seem to have failed me)
• God's salvation is a historical fact
  (even when I'm tempted to doubt it)
• I am small, frail and finite
  (it's not all about me and how I'm feeling)
• God's compassion and grace are infinite and unending
  (far bigger than this mood)
• God rules sovereignly over all things
  (including my life right now)

Here it is.

Psalm 103

Of David.

Praise the LORD, O my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
Praise the LORD, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits-
who forgives all your sins
and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,
who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

The LORD works righteousness
and justice for all the oppressed.

He made known his ways to Moses,
his deeds to the people of Israel:
The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.
He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;
he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.
As for man, his days are like grass,
he flourishes like a flower of the field;
the wind blows over it and it is gone,
and its place remembers it no more.
But from everlasting to everlasting
the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-
with those who keep his covenant
and remember to obey his precepts.

The LORD has established his throne in heaven,
and his kingdom rules over all.

Praise the LORD, you his angels,
you mighty ones who do his bidding,
who obey his word.
Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts,
you his servants who do his will.
Praise the LORD, all his works
everywhere in his dominion.
Praise the LORD, O my soul.

image is from withrow at flickr

questionnaire - identifying the lies and idols underlying your habitual sins

If your heart is an iceberg, sinful behaviours and negative emotions are only the tip. Underneath are the lies and idols of your heart. We've been looking at the iceberg: our characteristic false beliefs and sinful desires. Today, let's start with the tip. How can you work backwards from a particular struggle to the lies and idols underlying it?

Think of a habitual sin you don't seem to be able to overcome. Or think of a situation where you often feel angry, fearful or discouraged. You can use the questions below to help you identify the lies and idols underlying this particular struggle.

I've taken these questions from Elyse Fitzpatrick's Idols of the Heart. I'll begin with her examples of common idols for women, then share a couple of her practical exercises.

Some examples of lies and idols

The lie that happiness can be found in something other than God is the fountainhead from which all our idolatry flows. What might some of these lies look like? Let me give you some examples and see if they resonate with you.

• In order to be truly happy, I must have a spouse who is godly, romantic, responsible, and a good communicator.
• In order to be truly happy, I must have obedient children who please me.
• In order to be truly happy, I must have a good job where I am respected and well paid.
• In order to be truly happy, I must be loved and appreciated by others.
• In order to be truly happy, I must feel safe from all calamity.
• In order to be truly happy, I must have enough money to live in comfort.

Identifying the lies which underlie your habitual sins

Our idolatrous beliefs become evident as we find ourselves habitually sinning in some particular way. If I discover, for instance, that I frequently respond in anger when criticized, then I need to consider what idolatrous thought or imagination is at the root of my anger. To do this, I should ask myself the following questions:

1. What do I believe about the source of true happiness in this circumstance?

2. What do I believe about God in this circumstance?

3. What do I believe about myself - my rights, my goals, my desires?

4. What am I trusting in?

Identifying the idols which underlie your habitual sins

Think back to the last time you know you sinned. ... Choose a sin that you habitually fall into, like anger, self-indulgence, or fear [anxiety], for instance. Write this circumstance down.

With this circumstance in mind, ask God to help you answer the following questions. Try not to give one-word answers that don't plumb the depth of your thoughts, desires, and fears. Each of these questions will help you to understand your idolatry, so don't hurry through your answers. Instead, prayerfully ask God, the Heart Knower, to reveal your "functional gods" to you.

1. What did you want, desire, or wish for?

2. What did you fear? What were you worrying about?

3. What did you think you needed?

4. What were your strategies and intentions designed to accomplish?

5. What or whom were you trusting?

6. Whom were you trying to please? Whose opinion of you counted?

7. What were you loving? Hating?

8. What would have brought you the greatest pleasure, happiness, or delight? What would have brought you the greatest pain and misery?

from Elyse Fitzpatrick's Idols of the Heart pp. 117, 119, 163; I've added headings, and I've added numbers to the second list

image is from stock.xchng

Charles Taylor on 10 irrational beliefs that influence our behaviour

On Monday I invited you to do a questionnaire about the wrong beliefs about God and the world which often control our thoughts, emotions and behaviour. Here's some of the possible answers to these wrong beliefs.

I'd like to write my own version of this material some time, but for today, I've taken this from Janet Reeve's adaptation of material from Charles Taylor's The Skilled Pastor.* It's a good place to start as you begin to replace the lies which underlie your sins and negative emotions with God's truth.

1. Demand for approval - “You must like me! You must approve of me!”

I believe I must have the love and approval of significant people – a need! In fact although I desire people’s love and approval I don’t need it.

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Rom 5:6-8

2. High self-expectation - “I should; I must; I ought to……..!” “I can do it!”

Striving for competence becomes ultimate. Hence failure and low self esteem are inevitable.

But now a righteousness from God, apart from law, has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. (Rom 3:21-24)

3. Condemning the offender – “It’s all my fault! It’s all your fault!”

Holding myself, and others, accountable for our actions is important. Blaming elevates my opinion and destroys the God given worth of people. Releasing myself, and others from burdensome standards is freeing. [I would say: learn to forgive, as God has forgiven you.]

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Rom 5:8)

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. (Lk 6:37 cf Matt 6:12)

But they will have to give account to him who is ready to judge the living and the dead. (1 Pet 4:5)

4. Low frustration tolerance – “Life was meant to be easy! I don’t deserve this kind of trouble!”

When we make a catastrophe of events, and see them as intolerable, our own plans and self-care become central values. Choose to see frustrations and unfairness as paths to the Kingdom [and paths to growth - Rom 5:3-4].

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. (2 Cor 12:9)

Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, and he began to teach them saying: "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. ..." (Matt 5:1-12)

5. Emotional irresponsibility - “I’m not responsible! It wasn’t my fault! Someone else can handle that.”

The LORD sent Nathan to David. ... Nathan said to David, "You are the man!" ... Then David said to Nathan, "I have sinned against the LORD." (2 Sam 12:1-13)

6. Anxious over-concern - “What if! What if!”

Over-focussing on a threat exaggerates its danger and reduces evaluation, acceptance and action.

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life ... But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matt 6:25-33)

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Phil 4:6)

7. Problem avoidance - “Let’s have fun! Self- discipline is too hard and not cool! No worries!”

Not worrying becomes so central that responsible action and self-discipline are avoided.

Then he said, '... You have plenty of good things laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.' But God said to him, 'You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?' (Lk 12:18-20)

All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty. (Prov 14:23)

Rather he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined. (Tit 1:8)

8. Historical determinism - “It’s not my fault. ‘So and so’ or ‘such and such’ are to blame!”

A belief that emotional misery comes from external events means you have little ability to control or change your feelings. A false value may become central so that past influences on your life continue to dominate you. Challenge irrational beliefs and ‘should’, ‘ought’ and ‘must’ in your thoughts and words.

As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?" "Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life." (Jn 9:1-3)

9. Need for perfection - “Everything needs to work out how I imagine it or I can’t cope.”

The demand for perfection dooms us to frustration or failure and alienates us from reality in an imperfect world. (Eph 5:20, Phil :6)

... give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thess 5:18)

If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives. (1 Jn 1:8-10)

10. Passive happiness - “I can’t be bothered! Why doesn’t life work out for me?”

Rest and enjoyment, inertia and inaction are central values. Vibrant happiness comes with deep involvement and not giving in to fear or laziness.

Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me and for the gospel will save it." (Mk 8:34-35)

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men. (Col 3:23)

*I've taken this from the seminar on burnout at MTS Challenge Conference Victoria which was led by Janet Reeve who teaches pastoral care at BCV. She adapted this from Charles Taylor's The Skilled Pastor: Counselling as the Practice of Theology.

a questionnaire - identifying your false beliefs

I don't know about the guys, but every woman loves a questionnaire!

Last week we talked about how wrong beliefs are the root cause of all our sins and most of our negative emotions. But how do you identify your wrong beliefs?

Here's a helpful questionnaire from a seminar on burnout I went to recently.* You might like to print it out and fill it in. In a day or so, I'll share some of God's great answers to these wrong beliefs.

Catching your false beliefs

Here are some common beliefs that people live by. How would you challenge them? Choose two or three that influence you a lot, and make a commonsense and a biblical challenge for each.

1.Demand for approval (Everyone must like me.)
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2. High expectations (I must be thoroughly competent and achieving, and always get it right.)
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3. Condemning the offender (If I, or others, make mistakes or do wrong, we are bad and worthless.)
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4. Low frustration tolerance (I cannot stand frustration, unfair treatment or rejection.)
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5. Emotional irresponsibility (I’m not responsible! Someone else can handle that.)
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6. Anxious over-concern (I must worry about things that have potential for problems. What if…?)
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7. Problem avoidance (Avoid difficulties and responsibilities in life. Let’s have fun! Self-discipline is a struggle.)
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8. Historic determinism (It’s not my fault. It’s just how I am! It’s so and so / such and such which is at fault.)
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9. Need for perfection (Situations and people should be good and it’s awful and horrible when they are not! Everything needs to work out how I imagine it, or I can’t cope!)
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10. Passive happiness (Happiness should just come to me. I can’t be bothered! Why doesn’t life work out for me?)
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*The seminar on burnout was at MTS Challenge Conference Victoria, and was led by Janet Reeve who teaches pastoral care at BCV. She adapted these questions from Charles Taylor's The Skilled Pastor: Counselling as the Practice of Theology.

image is from artnoose at flickr

Tim Chester on sin and unbelief

On Sunday morning I sing of my belief in justification by faith (confessional faith), but on Monday morning I still feel the need to prove myself (functional disbelief). … I may affirm that God is sovereign (confessional faith), but still get anxious when I can’t control my life (functional disbelief). Sanctification is the progressive narrowing of the gap between confessional faith and functional faith. ...

Not many people think of themselves as someone who believes lies! But every time we don’t trust God’s word we’re believing something else, and that something is always a lie. If I get angry when I’m stuck in traffic it’s because I don’t trust God. I believe the lie that God isn’t in control or that his purposes for me are not good. …

This is a radical view of sin. It means many of our negative emotions are sinful because they’re symptoms of unbelief – the greatest sin and the root sin. Whenever we’re depressed or bitter, it’s because we believe God isn’t being good to us or that he’s not in control. …

We can sin only if we suffer from a radical loss of perspective. Only if we forget that God is great and good can we sin.

Tim Chester You Can Change 82, 87, 92, 103

image is from stock.xchng

how we change (7) what truths do you need to turn to?

Here's where it gets exciting. Let me introduce you to what I call "the 4 Gs". For me, the 4 Gs are the highlight of Tim Chester's You Can Change, and I'm not alone: my friend, whose life was turned upside down by God through this book, turns to the 4 Gs every day. Here they are:

1. God is great – so we don’t have to be in control
2. God is glorious – so we don’t have to fear others
3. God is good – so we don’t have to look elsewhere
4. God is gracious – so we don’t have to prove ourselves

Easy to remember, bursting with the conviction of God's loving sovereignty, full of hope: I turn to the 4 Gs every time I feel anxious, overwhelmed, depressed, discouraged, or guilty. Every time I'm tempted to value the praise of others over the praise of God. Every time I'm tempted to put my hope in possessions, pleasure, or relationships. Every time I'm tempted to prove myself through my perfectionism.

Why is it so important to turn to God's truth when we're tempted? Because every sin begins with a lie (Rom 1:25, Heb 3:12-14). You can't sin unless you believe happiness is found in something other than God. You can't worry unless you forget God's wise sovereignty over your life. You can't despair unless you doubt the love of the One who sent his Son to die for you.

I love how Chester puts it: our sin lies in the gap between "confessional faith" (what we say in church on Sundays) and "functional disbelief" (what we do and feel on Mondays). "We can sin only if we suffer from a radical loss of perspective. Only if we forget that God is great and good can we sin."

If sin begins with a lie, the cure is faith: believing the truth about God and the gospel. When the Bible talks about change, it begins with the gospel transforming our minds: "be made new in the attitude of your minds", "set your hearts" and "minds on things above" (Rom 12:1-2, Eph 4:22-24, Col 3:1-4, Heb 12:1). As we fill our minds with God's truth from his word, it burrows its way deep into us and transforms our emotions and choices.

One of the things which fascinates me about this cure - the idea that change comes as we turn from our wrong beliefs to the truth - is that it's as old as the psalms, and as new as the methods of modern psychologists.

It's as new as modern psychology. Cognitive behavioural therapy, the method now used most widely for treating anxiety and depression, is just a secular form of turning from wrong beliefs to more "realistic" interpretations of our circumstances.

Psychologists recognise that what causes my emotions and behaviour isn't ultimately my circumstances, but how I interpret my circumstances: "No-one will ever love me. I'm worth nothing if he rejects me. I can't cope if that happens." The alternate thoughts they offer are void of God, but they imitate sanctified wisdom: "It doesn't matter what people think of me. This feeling won't last forever. There will be other opportunities."

As Christians, we'll turn not only to common-sense and wisdom, but more importantly, we'll turn to truths about God: "What matters is what God thinks of me, and he loves me and sees me as perfect in Jesus. God's promises are more reliable than my feelings. My loving Father is in control of my circumstances." Alison Payne says that You Can Change “is like cognitive behaviour therapy driven by the gospel and the character of God.”

This cure is also as ancient as the Psalms. Listen to the Psalmists as they argue themselves out of fear, doubt and despondency and into trust and hope in God:

The LORD is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear? ...
Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God ...
Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; ... he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. ...
Has God forgotten to be merciful? ... To this I will appeal: ... I will remember the deeds of the LORD ...
Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
(Ps 27:1, 42:5, 62:5-6, 77:9-12, 103:1-2)

Can you hear them arguing, begging, pleading with themselves? Can you hear them taking their glooms and fears and beating them into submission with the weapon of God's truth? Can you hear them turning their anxiety into trust and their joy into praise?

The same cure has been handed down through the ages by wise Christian writers and preachers like the Puritans and Charles Spurgeon. Who could forget the words of Martyn Lloyd-Jones:

I say that we must talk to ourselves instead of allowing ‘ourselves’ to talk to us! … You have to take yourself in hand, you have to address yourself, preach to yourself, question yourself. ... And then you must go on to remind yourself of God, Who God is, and what God is and what God has done, and what God has pledged himself to do. Then having done that, end on this great note: defy yourself, and defy other people, and defy the devil and the whole world, and say with this man: ‘I shall yet praise Him.’ (Spiritual Depression pp.20-21.)

God's truth - his word and gospel - is our greatest weapon. Let's take the great truths about God - that he is great, glorious, good and gracious - and preach them to our souls. Let's believe God's word instead of our feelings and sinful desires. Let's take the gospel and dwell on it until it lives in our minds and hearts. Only then will true change become possible - change from the inside out.

For reflection:
When you struggle, what lies are you believing? What truths about God and the gospel could you turn to?

It might help to draw up a thought chart. You'll need 4 columns: 1 = situation, 2 = moods and actions, 3 = thoughts, 4 = thoughts and actions based on God's truth. In the 1st write what situation you were in when you struggled with a particular emotion or sinful behaviour. In the 2nd write what you were feeling and what you did. In the 3rd write the thoughts that were going through your head at the time. You might like to circle the "hot thought" - the one which was most strongly connected to what you felt or what you did. In the 4th write out new ways of thinking based on truths about God and the gospel, and on common-sense and wisdom; and some new ways of acting which will support these beliefs. If you'd like to see a worked example, please contact me.

If you'd like to see or use my seminar How Change Happens, which is based on Tim Chester's You Can Change, please contact me.

Tim Chester quotes are from chapter 5 of You Can Change

images are from Giampaolo Macorig, Leo Reynolds, LU5H.bunny, twenty_questions and Dimi15 from flickr; second last image is from stock.xchng; used with permission

Issues in Biblical Counselling by Ed Welch

I've been listening to a fantastic talk series during the last couple of months: Ed Welch's Issues in Biblical Counselling. It's a 24 talk short course which he gave at the Melbourne PTC.

If you meet one-to-one with other Christians to disciple them, if you're in ministry or Christian leadership, or if you struggle with issues like suffering, anxiety, anger or guilt (don't we all?!) you'll find these talks encouraging and challenging.

Ed Welch talked about

• the nature of biblical counselling and the person
• the 4 staples of counselling - suffering, guilt, anger and fear
• unusual problems - mania, schizophrenia, depression, addictions

Here's some things I learned:

• Christ is the centre of the process of change. We often use the Bible like an encyclopedia of proof texts. If a word ("anorexia", "OCD") isn't there, we assume the Bible doesn't address it; and if a word ("anxiety", "anger") is there, we stick to the "relevant" verses. But the Bible is the story of Christ, and of how God saves and transforms us through the gospel. This bigger story shapes how we respond to every issue - even those the Bible doesn't name. If someone wants help with a problem, don't just look up verses which address or condemn the problem: read passages which reveal Christ and win our hearts. The ultimate solution to every problem is the gospel of Jesus Christ.
• The Bible is sufficient to deal with all sinful behaviours and negative emotions. We often divide people into body, soul/psyche and spirit. The first is treated by doctors, the second by psychologists, and the third by the church. We hand people with issues like depression, addictions and anxiety over to professional counsellors. But if you trace any psychiatric illness back to its historical roots, you'll find that people once turned to the church for help. We can learn from secular counsellors, and medication can relieve symptoms. But God's word and gospel alone can change the heart. God's word is clear - it's not just for scholars - and we'll find our answers here.
• Our behaviour and emotions come from our hearts (although our emotions are also affected by our bodies). With our hearts, our inner selves, we think and believe, and with our hearts, we worship and desire. We can't blame our actions on our circumstances, personality or upbringing: we choose how to respond. Christian counsellors often speak of the person as someone with needs for love and relationship. But our hearts are not so much empty vessels waiting to be filled, as rudders directing us towards what we desire. Our hearts are active not passive.
• The horizontal reveals the vertical. If you see me get angry, or hear me complaining, you learn that I'm ultimately angry or resentful towards God. Our emotions and actions show who has our allegiance, God or Satan. Who do we worship? Who do we trust? Whom will we serve?
• The four staples of counselling are suffering, guilt, anger and fear. We'll have lots to say to anyone who's struggling if we learn how the Bible responds to these four issues. Ed Welch spent hours talking about suffering, specifically about how he would respond to someone who was sexually abused as a child. His two talks on guilt and legalism shook my perfectionism to its core. He called the angry to become like Christ. His talks on anxiety encouraged me deeply.
• Move towards those who are suffering. If there's one thing I took away from these talks, this is it! Those who are suffering are prime targets for Satan's attacks, so even if you feel completely helpless, move towards those who are suffering. Don't ignore them, don't say nothing, don't forget to call. At the very least, say "I'm so sorry." Don't just offer to help, give practical help. If you have nothing to say, listen, and pray with them from God's word. God pursues us, so we should pursue others.
• Aim for self-forgetful love not self-esteem. The gospel is the story of the God who saves unworthy sinners not because there's anything good in us, but because he loves us for his own glory. The gospel doesn't so much encourage us to think better or worse of ourselves as less frequently about ourselves and more about Christ. True humanness is about loving others, not being loved; about glorifying God, not having my needs met.
• Ask the next question. Often, the most useful thing you can do is to ask one more question: "Why do you ...? Did you know that you ...? Do you want to change?" If you seem to be missing the point - if they're looking blank, like you're not taking them with you - stop and ask again, "What am I missing? Is what I'm saying helpful? Help me to understand what you're feeling." Walk beside people, don't stand over them.
• Find the normal in the abnormal. If someone is behaving bizarrely, or is making bizarre claims, treat them like anyone else. Ask ordinary questions: "What's going on here? Why are you doing that? Why do you feel scared?" Look for the person behind the behaviour. Listen for the issues we all struggle with: suffering, guilt, anger and fear. Ed Welch puts the Bible through its paces - is it sufficient to deal with addictions, mania and schizophrenia, and depression? - and shows how God's truth reaches ordinary people struggling with extraordinary problems.
• Christians should have a high tolerance for eccentricity. Have you noticed the space around unusual people in social gatherings? Christians should be moving towards people, not away from them! Ignore the bizarre behaviour unless it stems from deeper issues like anxiety, or leads to sin, then deal with it as you would with any other Christian, by encouraging faith and repentance. If the Bible doesn't address the behaviour, you don't need to either. If it's just odd behaviour that's putting a barrier between the person and others, don't ignore it: give honest advice out of love.
• There is hope for change. A great God is working in us through his powerful gospel by his indwelling Spirit, and he promises that we will one day be glorious creatures who perfectly reflect his glory. We should have boundless optimism for change in ourselves and others. When you see people change, take off your shoes: you are standing on holy ground.

images are from stock.xchng

gospel self-talk in simple sentences

What simple sentences do you use to remind yourself of God's truth?

What are the main temptations you struggle with? Do you have a short fuse, jumping all the way from calm to angry outburst in a second? Are you anxious, always struggling with fears and worries? Has bitterness overtaken your heart, driving out joy and contentment? Do you have what Ed Welch calls "a resistant strain of guilt", like a virus, driving out the comfort of God's grace?

I've talked lots on this blog about preaching to yourself. I want to share a way of doing this which I've found helpful recently.

You can preach God's truth to yourself by reading the Bible, memorising Bible passages, recalling Bible verses, listening to Christian music, or listening to talks: there are all kinds of ways of reminding yourself of God's goodness, sovereignty and grace.

But in the heat of the moment, when you're tempted to bitterness, anxiety or despair, these can be too slow and complicated (except maybe the Bible verse recall).

So what I've done is to invent simple sentences, quick summaries of Gods' truth, that I can speak to myself when I feel the familiar pull to doubt God's goodness, or worry about my children, or drown in guilt.

Here's some of my common temptations (I'm sure you have your own!) and the sentences I've come up with to combat them:

• When I've sinned, or made a mistake or a wrong decision, and I'm beating myself over the head with it:
  "I'm already perfect in God's eyes because Jesus died for me."
• When I'm worried about what someone thinks of me:
  "It doesn't matter what they think of me. It only matters what God thinks of me, and he just wants me to be faithful."
• When God hasn't answered one of my prayers - normally a trivial one! - or I'm late for school or something's gone wrong and I wonder if he loves me:
  "God doesn't exist for my convenience."
• When I feel bad and want to make myself feel better by eating:
  "The comfort this brings will soon turn to despair. My true comfort is found in Jesus."
• When I'm worried about the effect my sin has on my children:
  "God uses everything for my children's good and his glory, even my sin."
• When I'm tempted to be proud of something I've achieved:
  "I have nothing that I was not given. May all the glory go to God!"

I know these sentences are very simplistic. Perhaps "simple" would be a better word. For behind each of them lie truths about God which are rich, full and liberating: that God is absolutely sovereign, that he sent his only Son to die for me, that his grace frees me from condemnation, that I don't have to earn his favour, that he is good, and that his glory is all that matters.

What simple sentences do you use to remind yourself of God's truth?