Wednesday, January 16, 2008

the results are in!

It's the moment you've all been waiting for (or at least, you would have been, if you had any idea I was subjecting my husband to this) ... the results of Steve's personality test!

These results have only been gained with great difficulty on my part, since Steve has absolutely no interest in analysing his personality. I printed out this questionaire, but could only ask him the questions when:
a) he couldn't get away from me (i.e. when we were shut in the car together);
b) he could hear me over the car stereo (Steve is introducing our kids to the delights of music from the 60's, 70's and 80's, from the Beatles through Abba to U2. Ever heard a 4-year old sing "Ah wanna wock an' woll all nigh' "? It's very distracting.);
c) he was willing to answer "just a few questions" (i.e. a page or two of unswerables such as "The process of searching for a solution is more important to you than the solution itself" - answer "no", we think).

It only took me 3 months to gather this information.

Well, it turns out that Steve is a borderline INTJ / ISTJ, using the Myer-Briggs Type Indicator. But it is the INTJ characteristics which so amusingly sum him up.

For INTJs apparently:

- project an aura of "definiteness" and self-confidence - occasionally mistaken for arrogance (surely not!) by us mere mortals;

- have a witty and irreverent sense of humour, and can occasionally be seen to clown around;

- are non-conformists, even if they observe social norms for their own or others' sake ("But the invitation doesn't say I have to wear a suit!");

- choose jobs combining intellect and incisiveness (student work, anyone?);

- are not easily taken in by buzzwords or slogans ("Why would anyone want to eat a hamburger just because they see it in an ad?");

- (now this one's bizarre) tend to be guarded in their facial expressions, but when they become animated, use characteristic hand movements (Steve's gestures while giving a talk have led to many amusing parodies on the part of his trainees - and not a few unconscious imitations);

- have a strong need for privacy (it would take a pick-lock or a crowbar to break into Steve's home office while he is working);

- are deeply committed in relationships, but see rituals and ceremonies (like weddings) as a waste of time (it's amazing what you will go through for the sake of your wife-to-be, although our wedding photos do reveal a certain subtle resistance - bleached hair, anyone?);

- have the same personality type as C.S.Lewis, Gandalf the Grey, Mr. Darcy (now there's a triumvirate to be proud of) Jane Austen (yeah!) and Hannibal Lecter (oops!). Oh, and Dr. House (I added that one for fans of House).

Interestingly, the NT's best match is an NF (which, like astrological matchmaking, should be taken with a large grain of salt unless, like me, you're an NF a married to an NT).

The NT's calm steadiness complements the NF's emotional warmth (for which read: cold fish need warming up, and volatile ditherers need grounding). And they both enjoy abstract discussions and playing around with language (for which read: no-one else is going to have patience with all that obscure conversation).

And if the NTs love of chasing down fine logical distinctions in an argument can wear out the NF's patience (particularly when the argument gets heated), and the NT's lack of emotional expression occasionally rubs the NF's emotional expressiveness up the wrong way (and vice versa, no doubt) - well, no relationship's perfect.

Still, NTs make "wonderful mates", being loyal, uncomplaining, warm and honest. And both types are uncommon and only rarely find each other. Which makes me all the more grateful for God's sovereign care - and sense of humour.

What other human being would have married Steve or me and enjoyed it?

4 comments:

Heather said...

No surprises here!

It all sounds very like another INTJ I know! And I can also comfirm that NT's are complementary for NF's.

Ruth McIntosh said...

Yes, I DID enjoy reading it! Think I might use the same tactics to personality test another member of the family! love Ruth

Nicole said...

I'm married to an INTJ as well...and as a NF can definitely identify with you. A very complementary mix.

Rachach said...

Hey, we're the same Jean! The N part of Jonathan's personality was and still is the thing I was/am most attracted to in his personality.