my role models of Christian womanhood

This is an extract from my interview for EQUIP book club today. I thought you'd enjoy this bit!

Who have been your role models of Christian womanhood?

- my Mum, who loves Jesus and who has a very different personality to me, bless her, and thus, by God's grace, taught me to balance my weaknesses (perfectionism, pessimism) with her strengths (a willingness to make mistakes and a great ability to laugh at herself)

- my dear friends Jenny and Emma, who never stop encouraging me to live for Jesus

- godly older women whose example has encouraged me to be a Titus 2 woman to younger women - Deb, Rosie and Heather are some names which spring to mind (you know who you are!)

- women I know who struggle with depression, severe anxiety or ongoing grief and keep loving God and serving others through their pain

- women who write and teach about biblical womanhood like Sharon James, Elyse Fitzpatrick and Carolyn Mahaney

You can read the rest of the interview - which is mainly about books I've read and enjoyed this year - at EQUIP book club today.

animism, alive and well

I worked with a group of southern Sudanese pastors to help them to develop a discipleship training program for their churches. Remembering my own experience, I suggested that the starting point be a study explaining the nature of grace. “Yes”, they agreed, “after we have taught about witchcraft”. It seemed extraordinary that ‘Discipleship 101’ in Sudan should begin with a study on witchcraft. But as I talked with my Sudanese friends, I came to appreciate that to understand grace, we must first realize that God is sovereign over all creation and that our world is not controlled through curses and spells. True grace cannot be understood properly by those trapped in an animistic worldview.1

What the Sudanese church is learning, we are unlearning. We walk around towns and claim them for God; we seek deliverance from family curses; we release Christians from spirits of anger; we refuse to live in places where bad things have happened. Many Australian Christians share the belief of our non-Christian neighbours that evil clings to places and has to be cleansed or it will threaten the future occupants.

My husband and I came face-to-face with this attitude when we moved into our home eight years ago. As we met the neighbours, it became clear that our house had a chequered past. One by one, they hesitantly asked, “Did you know that the people who lived in your house last grew marijuana?” The purpose of the enclosed room under our house with metal brackets welded to the ceiling and an abundance of black plastic tubs on the shelves—the room that the real estate agent pretended ignorance of—became all too clear. ...

You can read the rest at Sola Panel.

1 David Williams, ‘One to one: The essential ingredient of pastoral care’ in The Briefing #372, September 2009, p. 23.

CS Lewis on love, feelings and the will

On Monday I mentioned that it's not just our beliefs that change our behaviour, but also our behaviour that changes our beliefs.

Actually, it's not so much that our behaviour changes our beliefs (change is from the heart) but that our behaviour strengthens our beliefs when it comes from a changed heart.

If a small, weak, faltering faith acts in love and obedience, this love and obedience will rebound and grow that faith. Faith and repentance grow stronger as they express themselves in love.

Here CS Lewis says something similar: that the choice to love grows the feeling or attitude of love.

Love, in the Christian sense, does not mean an emotion. It is a state not of the feelings but of the will ...

Do not waste time bothering whether you 'love' your neighbor; act as if you did. As soon as we do this we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone, you will presently come to love him. ...

This same spiritual law works terribly in the opposite direction. ... The more cruel you are, the more you will hate; and the more you hate, the more cruel you will become — and so on in a vicious circle for ever.

Good and evil both increase at compound interest. That is why the little decisions you and I make every day are of such infinite importance. The smallest good act today is the capture of a strategic point from which, a few months later, you may be able to go on to victories you never dreamed of. An apparently trivial indulgence in lust or anger today is the loss of a ridge or railway line or bridgehead from which the enemy may launch an attack otherwise impossible. ...

On the whole, God's love for us is a much safer subject to think about than our love for Him. Nobody can always have devout feelings: and even if we could, feelings are not what God principally cares about. Christian Love, either towards God or towards man, is an affair of the will. If we are trying to do His will we are obeying the commandment, 'Thou shalt love the Lord thy God'. He will give us feelings of love if He pleases. We cannot create them for ourselves, and we must not demand them as a right. But the great thing to remember is that, though our feelings come and go, His love for us does not. It is not wearied by our sins, or our indifference; and, therefore, it is quite relentless in its determination that we shall be cured of those sins, at whatever cost to us, at whatever cost to Him.

from CS Lewis Mere Christianity chapter 9

images are from Divine Harvester and ' B a r c a at flickr

hear ye! hear ye! the When I Don't Desire God series is about to commence!

I'm going to ask you a question. When I ask it, close your eyes and see what pops into your head. Are you ready? Here's my question:

What brings you joy?

What did you think of? Was it a relationship, a walk along the beach, or a favourite hobby? When I asked the women in my Bible study this question, the answers were as varied as "words", "God's creation", "watching my daughter learn something new". You might like to share your responses in the comments.

My guess is that most of us long to feel this same kind of joy in God. We know we should rejoice in God, but we're not sure how that feels, or how to go about it. Which is where John Piper comes in. When I Don't Desire God: How to Fight for Joy doesn't just tell us that joy in God is good, it tells us how to fight for joy, and gives us weapons for the fight. ...

There's still time: why not grab a copy of When I Don't Desire God and read along with us during November as we learn how to fight for joy.

You can read the rest of this post at EQUIP book club today. If you click on the book cover in the right hand column of EQUIP book club, you can order a copy of When I Don't Desire God; or Koorong has plenty of copies at most of its stores, including the Melbourne ones.

how we change (9) what will you choose?

You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. (Eph 4:22-24)

I've turned navel-gazing into an art form. A questionnaire about my idols? A thought-chart to identify my false beliefs? A journal, a pen, and an anxious heart? Give them to me, and I'm your woman.

I'll think, read, write, examine my heart, repent, analyse, pray, list, reflect, dissect, introspect, with the best of them.

In some ways, then, books like Tim Chester's You Can Change feed right into my tendency to self-absorption and my drive to perfect myself (although this isn't Chester's fault: he takes care to guard against these things).* He issues a gold-edged invitation to identify the lies and idols of my heart, and I'm the first on the RSVP list.

Don't get me wrong: every day I'm grateful for books like Chester's as I argue with my thoughts, battle my emotions and fight my besetting sins. It's important to deal with sin not just at the surface level, but at the deeper level of what I believe and what I worship.

But I've come to see that sometimes I need to stop praying and thinking and start acting. It's not just about "attitudes", it's also about "putting off" and "putting on" (Eph 4:22-24). Every day - every moment! - I stare sin in the face and have to choose to behave differently. That, I'm not so good at.

Which is why, in case you're like me, and in imitation of Elyse Fitzpatrick's Idols of the Heart, I've added a third step to Chester's two main steps for change:

1. thoughts- turning from lies to trust God's truth (faith)
2. desires - turning from idols to worship God alone (repentance)
3. will - choosing to act in love and obedience (repentance)

You'll notice that 3. is actually an extension of 2, which is why Chester deals with them together. As Elyse Fitzpatrick points out, our wills don't work independently - they follow our thoughts and desires. You can't abandon idols in your heart and not in your life. But I need help with changing my behaviour, so I like the way Elyse Fitzpatrick takes several chapters to talk about the nitty-gritty of practical change.

Perhaps it's a woman's thing. I've noticed we're much keener than the guys on thought-diaries and questionnaires and the details of daily life. This is both a disadvantage (navel-gazing, anyone?) and an advantage (we don't leave things at the level of theory).

Change begins in the heart, but it doesn't end there. Let me give you some examples:

• the woman who's been praying for years that God will improve a difficult relationship and transform her emotions. One day she realises it's time not just to pray, but to love. As she does, her attitudes and feelings begin to change.
• the woman who's terrified of crowded rooms. She avoids church and prays for God to take away her fear. But she knows she has to do the hard thing. She starts small - with a Bible study group - and works up to bigger church meetings. It's not easy, but her fears lessen with time.
• the woman who knows she should offer hospitality to her neighbours, but who's ashamed of her shabby house. She prays about her her idolatry - her need to impress people. She repents of her lovelessness. But she has to take another step: to pick up the phone and ask the neighbours over. When she does, her fears are shown to be the small things they always were.

I don't change my behaviour through a set of disciplines (though it will take self-discipline!) or in the strength of my will-power (though I do need to make a choice). God's Spirit is the great heart-changer. When I "put off" the old self and "put on" the new, I'm only doing what God has already done in me. I "work out" my salvation because God is powerfully "working in" me to "will and to act". I obey because I'm confident God has given me everything I need to be godly. **

But changing my behaviour isn't easy or automatic. It's violent, energetic and purposeful. I can play with sin, feed it, cuddle up to it. Or I can put off sin - kill it, gouge it out, throw it off - and put on obedience.**

Every moment, I can choose to resist the first intrusion of sin: the impure look, the self-pitying thought, the unkind word, the selfish act. This isn't legalism: it's a response to grace, which teaches me to say "no" (Tit 2:11-12).

Faith gets stronger as it expresses itself in love. As I stop giving in to my fears, I learn to trust God more. As I refuse to serve my idols, they become less important to me. Every time I say "no", "no" gets a little easier. I call this the faith that comes from obedience.***

If you want some help making practical changes in your behaviour, why not read Elyse Fitzpatrick's Idols of the Heart? Her practical exercises gave me a blueprint to use with any and every issue, especially when I get stuck. Because sometimes it's time not just to think, but to act.

For reflection:
What attitudes and actions do you need to "put off"? What attitudes and actions do you need to "put on"? Are there small steps that would help you with the bigger ones? Or is it time just to say "no" - or "yes"! - in confidence that God is powerfully at work in you?

* And Nicole's too, apparently!

** see Ezek 36:24-27; Eph 4:22-24, Rom 6; Phil 2:12-13;2 Pet 1:3, Eph 1:18-21, 3:20-21, Col 1:28-29). See Mt 5:29, Rom 8:13, Col 3:5, Rom 13:12, Eph 4:22, 25, Heb 12:1, Col 3:8-9, Jam 1:21, 1 Pet 2:1, Eph 4:24, Col 3:10, 1 Thess 5:8, Rom 13:14, Col 3:12, Rev 19:8.

*** If you want to explore this further, have a look at Stuart's series on this topic, where you'll find useful insights from someone working within The Crowded House church, founded by Tim Chester: The chicken of belief and the egg of behaviour, It's a heart issue, Hypercardiodynia: taking the 'heart issue' too far (Part 1), Hypercardiodynia: taking the heart issue too far (Part 2), and Back to the heart. HT Nicole

images are by gaspi your guide and kingary and TheAlieness and brioso at flickr

it's a bird! it's a plane! no, it's Super Froggy!

We call him "Froggy". He calls himself "Super Froggy".

We say, "Hey Andy, you're cute!" He says, "No I'm not. I'm Super Froggy!"

Super Froggy can jump "vewy, vewy high".








Don't worry: despite appearances, Super Froggy never hurts himself. He's been jumping since he could walk.

a woman who loves to teach

I wrote this a while ago, and in the way of things, it's not something I'm feeling at the moment - just something I struggle with occasionally! But in case it's something you struggle with too, here it is:

It's not always easy being a woman who loves teaching. It's not always easy being a woman who loves theological argument. It's not always easy being a woman who loves reading, reflecting and writing.

I'm not complaining. I am glad, so glad, that my body carried our 4 children for 9 months (impossibly draining and difficult as it was) and that I had the incredible experience of giving birth to them and smelling their yeasty soft damp heads as they nestled against me. I'd never give up the joys of female conversations and female crafts and female caring.

I rejoice in the role that God has given me. I rejoice in the gentle strength of submission and the beauty of a marriage which, in its own imperfect way, is a stumbling yet increasingly joy-filled picture of the marriage of Christ and the church. I rejoice in the blessing of teaching and encouraging women, and watching them blossom into the women God wants them to be, strong and free in the grace of Christ.

But there's part of me that longs for the quiet life of a scholar. There's part of me that watches men teaching mixed gatherings of Christians and longs to teach all the wonders I've discovered in God's word to my brothers and sisters. There's part of me which struggles with the impulse to butt into conversations about theology and stun listeners with my insights.

At this point, some of you are probably thinking, "Well, why not? Does God give us gifts and desires for no reason?" It's not so simple when you're convinced that the Bible teaches different roles for men and women. The post that sparked these ramblings - Spirit-Gifting and Ministry in the Church - reminds us that none of us, whatever our views, are free to use our gifts without qualifications, and that God doesn't make mistakes.

God has made me the way he has for a reason. He makes women who write and women who love to spend hours with their noses in a book and women who enjoy teaching for a reason. He makes you, with your gifts, for me; and he makes me, with my gifts, for you.

Not for my glory. Not so that I can be recognised and respected. But for his glory. So that within the confines of this small life, with its boundless opportunities to teach and train our children and to teach and encourage my Christian sisters and to encourage my Christian brothers, his name may be glorified.

So that you and I, my Christian sisters, may build one another up in the faith. So that we, with our Christian brothers, may be transformed into the likeness of Christ. So that together we may honour and glorify our Lord.

images are from stock.xchng

psalm for the downcast (2)

Last term, when I was immersed in almost constant despondency, I went for a memorable walk. Every step had to be forced against what felt like a resisting invisible barrier. I tried to pray, to think, to get some kind of handle on what I was feeling, but my thoughts were scattered and sluggish.

Into my troubled thoughts broke Psalm 103, plucked from my memory by God's Spirit. I found myself saying it out loud: "Praise the LORD, O my soul ... who forgives all your sins ... who redeems your life from the pit...". My mood was unchanged, but the words fed my tiny spark of faith until it burned a little brighter.

At that moment, I realised how suitable psalms of praise are for the discouraged. I've always encouraged those who are depressed to learn and pray psalms of lament, like Psalm 130. But I've never thought of suggesting psalms of praise. I guess I assumed such psalms would seem flippant, insensitive or irrelevant.

But words - especially God's words! - are powerful things. As you say them out loud, they make their way into your insides. You might not feel like praising God, but it's good to speak words of praise even when you don't feel like it. It's good to exhort your soul to praise God. It's good to encourage others to praise God. As you do, you're helped to stop dwelling on yourself and your emotions and to start looking at God and acting in love.

Psalm 103 packs a punch for the desolate, for it reminds us of 6 truths we often forget and need to preach to our souls when we're tempted to despair:

• God's character is unchanging
  (however I feel)
• God's blessings are unfailing
  (though they may seem to have failed me)
• God's salvation is a historical fact
  (even when I'm tempted to doubt it)
• I am small, frail and finite
  (it's not all about me and how I'm feeling)
• God's compassion and grace are infinite and unending
  (far bigger than this mood)
• God rules sovereignly over all things
  (including my life right now)

Here it is.

Psalm 103

Of David.

Praise the LORD, O my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
Praise the LORD, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits-
who forgives all your sins
and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,
who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

The LORD works righteousness
and justice for all the oppressed.

He made known his ways to Moses,
his deeds to the people of Israel:
The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.
He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;
he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.
As for man, his days are like grass,
he flourishes like a flower of the field;
the wind blows over it and it is gone,
and its place remembers it no more.
But from everlasting to everlasting
the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-
with those who keep his covenant
and remember to obey his precepts.

The LORD has established his throne in heaven,
and his kingdom rules over all.

Praise the LORD, you his angels,
you mighty ones who do his bidding,
who obey his word.
Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts,
you his servants who do his will.
Praise the LORD, all his works
everywhere in his dominion.
Praise the LORD, O my soul.

image is from withrow at flickr

happy 2nd bloggy birthday!

Two years ago, I wrote my first post on in all honesty. When I re-read those early posts, I'm astounded by the joy and enthusiasm I brought to blogging way back in the days of innocence! I'm a lot more aware of the downside now, but I still love blogging.

One of the best things about blogging is meeting so many wonderful, godly women. Many of you have become friends, and I thank God for the encouragement and wisdom you've given me, and each other, over the years, and for the way he's used you to clarify my thinking on so many topics I never thought I'd be writing about!

Today's your chance to drop in and say "hi". If you've never commented before, or even if you comment regularly, why not post a quick comment here today? I'd love to hear from you!

image is by landhere at flickr

home-made lolly bags and more for Lizzy's birthday

Lizzy turned 11 last Friday. It's hard to believe our beautiful little girl is getting so big!


She enjoyed making and decorating her own cake, and swapping around the letter candles so that they said things like "hippy barthday" - she thought this would be particularly appropriate for her dad, who loves baths!


She spent many hours during her school holidays sewing felt lolly bags for her friends.




Aren't they gorgeous?!


I took her and 3 of her friends to Luna Park


where she went on all the scariest rides without a trace of jelly belly


even if it meant going alone and completely upside down! (That's her on the left.)


Happy birthday, dear Lizzy ...




... until next year.

The patterns for the felt lolly bags were from The Usborne Big Book of Fairy Things to Make and Do.