Thursday, September 24, 2009

Mia Freedman on living in the present moment

It's Sunday morning, early, and a heavy roll of greyish paper encased in sticky pink plastic thuds onto our driveway. Removing the plastic wrap takes patience, dexterity, strength, sharp objects, and a willingness to risk deep lacerations to the hands and fingers.

The newspaper emerges, bent into tight curves which make it nearly unreadable. A little unfolding, a little bending back into shape, and there it is: the Sunday edition of The Age.

My husband heads straight for the sports section. I burrow deeper into the pile of papers. "Why do they print so many sections? Who wants to read all this stuff anyway? Where's my magazine? I think they've LEFT OUT MY MAGAZINE! Oh, here it is."

Who needs the news when you've got Sunday Life? Yes, I know I'm impossibly girly, but I turn straight to Mia Freedman's column, with an occasional brief detour to glance at the headlines, and feel myself slipping into sweet Sunday relaxation as I read her first words.

I love Mia. She's witty, smart and vulnerable. Her observations about womanhood are astute and entertaining. She's a real mum, complete with muffin top and mistakes.

Last Sunday, she helped me see something I hadn't seen before: that women find it much harder than men to live in the present. We regard the past with a mixture of guilt and nostalgia (scrapbooking, anyone?). We plan a hundred versions of the future down to every last detail, and worry about every possibility ("What if ..?"). You can read Mia's observations here.

I'm not sure what true assurance you can have about the past or future if you're not a Christian. There's still good common sense in not worrying - Jesus says, "do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself" - but this isn't worth much without his promise that "your heavenly Father knows" what you need (Matt 6:25-34). A vague New Age serenity about the present moment has no solid basis in reality: there really are things to regret and fear.

But we know that Jesus has died for us, and God has forgiven all our past mistakes (1 Jn 1:9f). He lovingly plans our lives, past, present and future (Ps 139:16). He calls us to trust and obey him in the present moment, not in a hundred hypothetical future moments, and gives us exactly as much grace as we need - right now (1 Pet 1:3).

If Mia is right, this is a message that women particularly need to hear.

8 comments:

mattnbec said...

"She's witty, smart and vulnerable. Her observations about womanhood are astute and entertaining. She's a real mum, complete with muffin top and mistakes."

Great description! I really like Mia's writing too. I think she has some fascinating insights into life as a woman.

I also find it interesting that her thinking on a good number of things overlaps mine when as a Christian, my worldview is so different to hers too (especially given her ex-Cosmo etc background). Some time, I'm looking forward to reading her book/s. I suspect her experiences of making mistakes and motherhood have changed her views on a few things. I wonder if we Christians can learn a bit from her willingness to admit her mistakes and learn from them and be vulnerable and honest.

mattnbec said...

Oh - and yes, I thought her observation about women not living in the present was perceptive too. I think she's onto something. But like you, it did strike me that in the end, anyone who doesn't know Jesus really won't have the ultimate answer to the worry and anxiety of life.

Jean said...

Thanks, Bec, for some astute observations! Like you, I've been fascinated by the way non-Christians often express Christian views, sometimes more clearly and with less embarrassment than us (e.g. Steve Biddulph on childcare, Bettina Arndt on sex, Mia on womanhood and fashion mags - although how she does this when she used to edit Cosmo, like you, I'm not sure! I guess her views must have changed.). I'm looking forward to reading her book too!! I'll bet it explains a few things! :)

Jean said...

I didn't mean "like you" as in you used to edit Cosmo - obviously! - but as in "like you I'm not sure". An errant comma made its way in there! :D

mattnbec said...

Perhaps I forgot to tell you about my Cosmo editting years...LOL! Actually, I read it the way you meant it anyway.

Yes - Steve Biddulph and Bettina Arndt are ones I'd put in that category too! I guess it's testament to the goodness of common grace and that it's worthwhile remembering that we can learn things from non-Christians because of it (albeit that those truths are not THE ultimate truth).

I have a vague recollection that Steve Biddulph might have a catholic background, so that might explain some of the overlap. I suspect Bettina Arndt may have become more conservative as she has got older too, like Mia (who has admitted as much on her blog, I seem to recall). Interestingly, I've noticed Mia seems to go along with some of Bettina's views on sex and relationships now.

It ocurred to me last night that one of the things we Christians have a big difference to those who aren't Christian in terms of living in 'the now' is that, of course, our 'now' is shaped by both the past (the cross) and the future (the new creation and our resurrection to glory). That's a profound difference which is both hard to remember sometimes when we are busy in the moment, but also hard to over-estimate in significance.

love Bec

Jean said...

"It ocurred to me last night that one of the things we Christians have a big difference to those who aren't Christian in terms of living in 'the now' is that, of course, our 'now' is shaped by both the past (the cross) and the future (the new creation and our resurrection to glory). That's a profound difference which is both hard to remember sometimes when we are busy in the moment, but also hard to over-estimate in significance."

Amen! Thanks for your helpful reflections - once again! Great to wake up to. :)

Jean said...

... And another one to add to Mia, Bettina and Steve. Susan Maushart, "Masks of motherhood".

mattnbec said...

I've heard of Susan, and I think maybe I've read a newspaper column or two of hers (??), but don't really know much about her.

I'm due to receive Mia's book, Mamamia, when my brother visits in November - I lined it up as an early Christmas present rather than having to pay huge postage costs. If/when you get it, I'd love to hear any thoughts you have. I wonder if it would be an interesting book to have a book-club session on from a Christian viewpoint.