Thursday, March 15, 2012

staying energised as a mum whatever your personality type

Two days ago I asked: how do you cope if you're a parent and an introvert? After you responded, I realised that coping can be just as hard when you're an extrovert, cooped up at home all day - but that the solutions will be different.

My friend Rachel send me a wonderful link for mothers (and others) that I wish I'd read 13 years ago. She wrote,

Jean, have you checked out motherstyles.com? They have this cool energy plan. It comes up with a list of ways you can be energised according to each of your four Myers Briggs letters. I love it!
Whether you're a mum or not, take the quiz (or this one if you're not a mum): it's well worth it. It will help you understand your mothering style: why you relate to your kids the way you do. Best of all, mum or not, it will give you four ways to refuel, to keep your energy for the long haul.

If you're wondering, I'm an INFJ, which makes me a 'know thyself' mum: 'I believe the joy of motherhood is self-discovery—for them and for me.' My self-care plan shows that I'm re-energised by time alone; time for reflection; a break from others' needs; and structure. Quadruple whammy. And I thought it was just because I was an introvert...

What's your type? What have you learned about your mothering style and how to stay energised in mothering? I'd love to hear from you!

13 comments:

Karen said...

ISTJ all the way here...
Off to organize and control my project now (writing a first year Uni tutorial) while the baby sleeps, the toddler is having her day at child care, and the big kids are at school.
And then this afternoon I am planning my sixty minutes of solitude before picking everyone up again.
Thanks for posting the link :)

Jean said...

Love it, Karen! Sounds like you work with your personality well. :)

Sarah Cooper said...

I'm an ISFJ, and I think I really am. All those things suggested in the energy plan I do find helpful, though they don't often happen regularly.
I feel a bit reassured that it's ok to be my type, instead of feeling bad (why aren't I with people all the time like so and so; they're so much better at ministry than me!). I'll have to be careful not to use it as an excuse for laziness though. I'll aim for a bit of balance. ;)

Jenny K said...

ESFP The “Totally There” Mother Well I'm not sure I agree with all of it there are aspects that are definitely me. I do like to be in the moment and do feel deep hurt when my children are hurt (I have been known to cry in public when my children have been emotionally hurt and also at moments of great joy!!) My husband is my complete opposite on this personality test so we balance each other well! I needed to be with people through the day when they were little but find I'm much more of a homebody now and love spending time with them when they are home!

Susie said...

Thanks for this Jean. I had a big laugh...on the inside. A helpful tool.

Jean said...

Don't you think the "totally there" mother sounds like the coolest type?? :)

Meredith said...

That's hilarious! I have always considered myself an ISFJ but the parent profile has me as an ESTJ!! Maybe now that the boys are at school and I get a few minutes here and there to myself I have become an extrovert!!! LOL.

Still, happy to be described as...

“We’re the mothers you like to carpool with. Not only are we on time, we organize the driving schedule for everyone.”

And now, as it happens, I am off to school to collect one son and his friend to take them to a special course. That would be the carpool thing - and yes, I organised to be the driver this morning. Hee hee.

simone r said...

ENTP —The “Independence” Mother

Yep. That's me.

Karen said...

I agree that the "totally there" mother sounds the coolest. I wish I was more like that sometimes....

The "responsibility" mother (me) sounds the most boring :) But I can live with it...

Jean said...

Yeah. *sigh* If it's any consolation, one of the coolest mums I know is 'responsibility' mum according to the test...:)

Deb L said...

ENTJ - the Executive Mother. *Ahem* I think that might mean I'm the really bossy one. But the profile did seem to fit at the end.

Kath said...

INFP here...
or as I think of myself - a disorganised introvert.
Thanks Jean, those sites were helpful :)

Jean said...

LOL executive mum, disorganised introvert (funny how many of those I'm unturning, both here and on Facebook...) this is making me giggle!